What I Gave Up for Lent

For Lent I decided to give up fashion shopping.  I am interested in fashion for fun, as an artistic/creative project, and as a means of cultural subversion.  It is something like a hobby for me, and I like to come up with creative, unique outfits.  I like to keep an eye on trends, certain brands I like, and street style.  I think on average, I probably buy something new approximately every month, usually online.  I'm trying to buy more and more second hand because it is more sustainable, and you can often find more unique and/or better quality items than in a chain or fast fashion store.

However, recently, I had come to realize that (1) I needed to save more money and (2) I felt like I was becoming ruled by shopping and always needing to buy something to feel like I was being 'current' and on top of developing my style and being a true practicing 'fashionista.'

When something starts to feel like it is controlling you instead of you controlling it, or stops feeling like fun, and begins interfering with your life and your sense of happiness, it's time to reexamine your relationship with that activity and change your habits.

I felt like this was appropriate to give up for Lent because I think our culture of consumerism and materialism is wrong and morally unhealthy.  Being interested in fashion can be a fraught hobby regarding this.  I felt like I was getting away from the positive, underlying things I liked about fashion and sinking into the negative and selfish ones.  Pope Francis asked us to fast from indifference to others this Lent;  and I felt like I could be more appreciative of the people in the fashion world, of myself, and of all the blessings in my life and become more in tune with how my actions were contributing to negative forces in our world if I were to fast from fashion.

Here are some of the things I observed so far:

1. When you try to fast from consumerism and materialism, you realize just how much messaging there is out there trying to get you to SPEND, SPEND, SPEND.  It is a land of empty promises and detachment and distraction from from things that are truly important.  I get many emails from brands and stores because I've signed up for them or I've bought from the store or my email has been sold to them.  There are some I don't know how I got on their email list.  But I easily get 10-15 emails a day from clothing brands or stores specifically trying to promote a sale or to just get me to spend money (and I'm separating this from emails/messaging that strives to build a brand or offer something else like a new look or fashion news item).  It's crazy!  We don't need to be spending money multiple times every day on non-necessities!  I really wish stores and brands would scale back on their bombardment of ads and messaging!  It is overwhelming and unnecessary.  It is shameful to have so much excessive temptation.   Some of the messaging is even more unhealthy than there rest of it--- explicitly promoting emotional shopping (shopping to cheer yourself up etc.) which really really bugs me.  My fast has helped me to just DELETE, DELETE, DELETE, cleanse that one aspect of my life.  I am also trying to get myself off some of the lists even if it means I might miss a sale or a cool new arrival.  I think all the messaging adds a lot of pressure and makes the shopping experience more stressful and less enjoyable.  Finding ways to eliminate some of this stuff has definitely help my life feel less cluttered and more clear.
2. Knowing that I am not going to buy anything is SO FREEING!  For a while I felt like I was under some sort of obligation to consider every sale, check out all the new arrivals constantly, and keep a running list of all the cool items I would need to buy to try out a new style or idea that caught my attention.  If I know I'm not going to buy anything, I don't need to do all of that!  And also, just generally I DON'T NEED TO DO ALL OF THAT.  I've been able to rededicate all that lost time to other things that are way more important to me.  I've eliminated a pressure I didn't consciously realize I was putting on myself.  I've realized that missing out on a certain item or sale is not a big deal and doesn't magically make me not a "real" fashion enthusiast.  And that scoring an item doesn't magically make me cooler or my life more fulfilling.  Things I've wanted or admired have sold--- but I actually found this liberating, because I seemed to be functioning under this sense that I HAD to buy all this stuff I liked.  Instead I was glad when things were bought by other people, initially because then I knew I didn't have to buy it and then worry if I'd made the 'wrong' choice (that item instead of another item) but then I found myself just being happy for the buyer and hoping they get a lot of fun and enjoyment out of their cool new item.  In short, I started freeing myself from a lot of unconscious rules and limitations I'd put on myself and it allowed me to make different choices and see things differently.
3. I've become more creative in my fashion.  Instead of seeing an outfit idea and trying to decide what I needed to buy to try it myself, I started to think of ways to use things I already had to reproduce the look.  There are more ways to express yourself than through buying stuff!  I also began looking to my closet and just experimenting with what I already have and having fun with that.  It made me realize that I really didn't need to be constantly shopping to enjoy fashion.  I could still look at street style, blogs, magazines etc. and appreciate them and enjoy them for their own sake, without feeling like the only way to express my interest and enjoyment was to purchase something.  This is definitely helping me remove a consumerist, materialistic mindset from my life and find alternative meanings and ways of expression.
4. I've become more grateful and appreciative of what I do have--- in many ways.  I've gone from thinking 'I have nothing cool to wear' to realizing I have a lot of cool things to wear that I can have a lot of fun with--- and understanding just how much of a luxury and a blessing that is.  I'm also being more aware of the supply chain issues in fashion and being more mindful and grateful for the work the people who created our clothes and make our fashion economy possible.  Honoring them would be to wear and cherish and appreciate the clothes I have, not just constantly looking for the next thing.
5. Fear of missing out is stupid.  Like I said before, I was constantly checking sales and new arrivals sections in case I missed out on some cool item or getting a discount on my wishlists.  I felt like if I missed something I would somehow lose street cred as a fashion person.  But through doing this I realized that (a) no one cares because I'm not a famous fashion person, and (b) I'm the only one judging me.  And anyway, there is so much going on I'm going to 'miss out' on buying some cool item no matter what.  It doesn't matter.  It is not the end of the world.  There are more important things to worry about and focus on.  Get a grip, basically.
6. Living with intentionality is living better.  Whether it's deciding when and where to shop, deciding what to shop for, or deciding other or bigger stuff . . . when you are focusing on a real, meaningful goal and making conscious choices, life is better.  You are happier in your task and you feel like you have more control over your life (because you do).  By removing the pressure to purchase I can decide what I'm doing when I'm checking out a style blog or fashion spread (admiring the artistry, getting some pure escapism, or thinking about ways to recreate a look with my own clothes).  I think when I do decide to shop again, I will feel more clear headed about what I'm doing, why I'm doing, and what exactly I'm looking for--- and what is really worth my time and money. 

I'm having such a satisfying time not shopping, I'm thinking about extending my fast beyond Lent. (Plus it is nice to save money, and I donated some money to a non-profit instead--- living with intentionality!) But we shall see how I'm doing come Easter.