I pretty much hated everything I saw on the red carpet this year. Everyone either wore super boring white, black or beige dresses or clingy gowns encrusted with metallic sequins. The place was drowning in sequins. I never want to see a metallic dress ever again. Seriously, like 5 people wore anything with color.
[Sidebar: Who cares about Jennifer Lawrence's ridiculously dress that actually physically impaired her all evening--- and not just that time when it prevented her from getting from her front row seat to the stage stairs. Ridiculous.]
Here are the only three dresses I liked from the red carpet.
#1. Jessica Chastain - This coppery dress with Chastain's beauty, skin tone and hair, in my opinion, was easily the most beautiful dress on the red carpet this year. It was the one dress worthy of exemption from my sequin/beading/metallic-hating.
#2. Halle Berry - I could get behind the art deco-ness of this dress. Bringing the Gatsy-trend to the party. I got pretty sick of her gushing about Bond movies though. SNOOZE.
#3. Jane Fonda - She just looked great. And she actually wore a color. Thank you Jane Fonda. Show these fools how it is done.
Since the red carpet was such a boring place, I combed the after-party photos to find a few other dresses of note.
#4. Solange Knowles - This woman is just generally on top of her stuff.
#5. Ginnifer Goodwin - Always looks cute and looked cuter than most of the other boring-colored, shiny metallicness happening around her.
Also here is a great picture of her and Josh Dallas:
#6. Lily Collins - Pretty. Purple. A little Gothic. but with stripes. A little different.
Worst: Well, pretty much everyone in metallics made me angry, as you can probably tell. Emmy Rossum looked particularly terrible (especially after looking so AWESOME in Beautiful Creatures).
And here is a picture of Jeremy Renner looking a little awkward to represent the men. I couldn't put a picture of Ben Affleck because he is just way too handsome and charming.
As for the Oscars themselves, I found them SUPER boring. And I usually find them interesting.
This was pretty much my reaction to the controversy that became represented by he who is known as Seth MacFarlene: http://www.shewired.com/box-office/2013/02/28/op-ed-feminists-defense-seth-macfarlane
Favorite things:
Taylor Swift not being invited.
Capt. Kirk trying to save the Oscars. (and no, not Chris Pine).
Joseph Gordon Levitt and Daniel Radcliffe dancing & singing.
The joke about the director of Argo being unknown to the academy.
The orchestra mercilessly using the theme to The Magnificent Seven to kick someone off the stage.
Jeremy Renner was funny when the Avengers presented stuff.
The TIE!
The Sound of Music joke.
Michelle Obama crashing the end of the Oscars.
Least favorite things:
That first song.
My parents deciding to watch that first song with me.
The pre-recorded jokes in the opening monologue. Just too long and not funny enough.
The Bond-worshipping.
The SUPER RANDOM musical numbers. So so painful.
Joseph Gordon Levitt and Daniel Radcliffe not being integrated into the SUPER RANDOM musical numbers.
Shameless Chicago promotion.
Jessica Chastain not winning. (Disclaimer: I do like Jennifer Lawrence.)
Anne Hathaway winning.
Les Mis winning anything.
Hearing anything about Les Mis.
Jack Nicholson showing up right at the end when I thought we'd actually escaped him for one year.
Nice surprises:
Argo winning best picture & Ben Affleck being handsome, emotional and inspiring.
Anna Karenina winning something.
Favorite speeches:
Ang Lee - most adorable speech
Daniel Day Lewis - most charming and errudite speech
Ben Affleck - most handsome, emotional and inspiring
. . .
And with that, I have spoken.
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