Life Update

My favorite Pinterest pin of last week.  Originally from the spread found here.

September is over already!  It has been super busy for me!

Work has been so busy and yet I haven't accomplished everything I wanted to get done.  We have had a lot of equipment breaking . . . a lot of it is old and abused, so it is not that unexpected, but it is annoying that it had to happen right now when we are in the thick of things!  Also, my main team member and right-hand-gal got another job, so I've had to be a bit of a one-man-band most of the month and now am breaking in my new teammate.

In terms of personal goals, I'm pleased that I've gotten started on several things, and have gotten involved in a couple other creative things with people.  On top of doing some work on writing projects and a new blog idea (which involves recruiting some people to work with me as well as getting some technical assistance), I've been trying to post more consistently on this blog, doing some editing work for a friend, and getting more involved in the planning of our family reunion in July.  I've also been trying to get back into exercising more frequently (I took a bit of a hiatus in July-August and also got sick/injured a couple times), catching some British TV (Broadchurch and Hollow Crown, anyone?), and trying to schedule some fun cultural outings.  Plus there is that whole job search thing to do.

I'm at a point where I think I need to take a moment and assess what I'm committed to and how I'm going to manage it.  I feel really good about having so much to fill my time, but I need to make sure I'm controlling it and not the other way around!  I also don't want to let things slide accidentally because in several cases other people are depending on me.

Other things:

Having a fashion moment: Vanessa Bruno

I don't love everything about this collection, but loving the patterns and the bright popping reds!

Low cut tops and the cut-outs probably won't work for most people on a daily basis, but hopefully I can use it as inspiration.

My favorite patterns and colors are on: 1, 6, 14 and loving the zebra print bag at 26!

I also should say I really like to sandals in this collection, especially in the blue (like 13) or zebra print (27).  

Inspiration Lately: Mindy Kaling

Thanks to Jezebel, I caught this snippet from an upcoming magazine interview with Mindy Kaling.

I was really caught by her last sentence:

"But while I’m talking about why I’m so different, white male show runners get to talk about their art."

I often think we get so caught up in the saga of how artists and people we admire overcame the obstacles in their way, we forget to actually listen to what they are saying.  We are so interested in the drama of a underdog female comedienne or strong woman-of-color, we spend all our energy creating these comforting origin stories for our favorite celebrities and don't actually appreciate their greatest gift: their art.

I also often read interview with people (female artists especially) that I admire, and am disappointed because they don't ever get a chance to really discuss their art, their process, or how they feel their art has been received/interpreted.  I really want to know about the thought-process and techniques other female artists are using!

And for men, this definitely doesn't happen as much in interview, but I guess I hadn't realized that fully until Mindy pointed it out.  I'd love to stop talking about the artist and think about their brilliant ideas and art too, especially if they are groundbreaking women and people we admire and emulate.

This also sorta reminded me of one my favorite quotes from Zooey Deschanel:

"We can’t be feminine and be feminists and be successful? I want to be a f--king feminist and wear a f--king Peter Pan collar. So f--king what?"

I know Zooey Deschanel is a bit of a contentious issue for some people, but I actually think about this quote a lot.  Sometimes you have to stop overthinking it and just be you.  It is possible to fit into multiple categories.  Other people may label you and argue about what label you qualify for, but if you think you are doing your best and doing what is right and good . . .  that's good enough, and you have to feel confident and comfortable in that.

TWLOHA & the Six Words Twitter Fest

I saw an update from TWLOHA on facebook yesterday.

On Twitter they were asking people to fill in the rest of a statement in six words (in participation with the Six Word Twitter Fest which had something to do with Six Word Memoirs).  I'm not sure why they were participating in this, but I always try to pay attention to TWLOHA because they are so positive and occasionally slam you with something profound and beautiful.

The statement they were asking people to fill in was this:  "I'm better today than yesterday because . . ."

This really made me stop and think.  I'm rather not-content with where I am in my life and what I'm doing currently.  I often think about my daily life as a sort of waiting period until something better comes along.  I'm not going to get into all the problems with thinking about your life like that right now, but I will say it doesn't really afford me the opportunity to really appreciate everything I do get to do and experience from day to day.

Thinking about how I would respond to this statement--- verbosely or succinctly--- was a challenge!  My gut reaction was to think "I'm not any better today than I was yesterday,"  but the amazing thing about TWLOHA is that through their quiet, loving support, they challenge you to at least consider thinking about your life and attitudes from a new perspective.   Their phrase yesterday put a new spin on the old "think of one positive thing from your day" exercise, that really gave me pause and tricking me into taking stock of my life and my attitudes.

This hasn't completely revolutionized my life or made me make all sorts of decisions about getting my act together, but it is making me think some more about why I'm not content and what I can do about it.

I don't have a twitter account, but as for my six words, so far I've come up with this . . .

I'm better today than yesterday because:  I still loved a bit more.

Getting the Good Stuff Out of Your Scribbles

A friend of mine is doing a youtube series on writing/screen writing advice.  I emailed her a question about her writing process, and she answered with another episode!

Check it out!  I was surprisingly proud to get a shoutout on a youtube video!



(She's also really good about putting a outline of all the key points from the video in the description, so you don't forget the awesome things she is suggesting!)

Music this week: Ladies! and one gentleman

I decided to check out a lot of those it-girls we've been hearing about for a while now but which I've never actually listened to really.

But first!  Florence:

1. Drumming Song - Florence + the Machine

I recently realized that this song didn't make it onto my ipod!  OH NO!!!! Now it is on my ipod and I've been listening it to lots since I'd been missing it for a long time!  And love the music video (features Florence's famous bat outfit).

2. Maria - West Side Story 

Ok yeah, this isn't a woman singing, but it's about a woman so it is still on theme.  I don't know why but I've been humming this song a lot lately.  It's a great song, especially when you are just purely listening to it.  It is probably one of the most beautiful songs I know, and definitely one of my favorite favorite love songs.  The thought of a boy so in in love he is just running around singing a girl's name over and over again is just fantastic.  The fact that he makes it into the beautiful beautiful song is even better.

Mariiiiaaaaa,  Mariiiiiiiaa, Marriiiiiiiiiiiiiaaa Maria.  MaRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIaaa MaRIIIIIIIIIIIIIaaa, MarIIIIIIIIIIIIIIAAA  . . . ok I'll stop now.

3.  How We Do (Party) - Rita Ora

This song is so catchy and happy.

4. Sad Dream - Sky Ferreira

This song is not happy but I find calming.

5. Hurting Me Now - Sia

Ok I finally figured out how to use the 'radio' feature on Spotify and was listening to a Marina and the Diamonds radio and there was a lot of Sia on it.  I like it.  This was the song that really caught my attention, although I also really really like Bring Night--- super danceable.

6.  Lovers In The Parking Lot - Solange

Her music is not really my style, but I find a bunch of her songs catchy.  And this music video is fun.

7.  Dance With Me Tonight - Olly Murs

And finally the gentleman:  It is literally impossible to stay in a bad mood while listening to this song.

Although they do get a dance in at the end, I have to admit I am pretty disappointed that the music video was not just one big epic retro dance number.

In the Papier: Fire birds!

A friend recently sent me this card.  I don't usually like cards in this general style, but I really like this one!

I like the design of the birds and the color of orange they are surrounded in.  It makes me think they are super-birds just chilling in a lava flow!

Card is from Hallmark.

Having a Fashion Moment: Just Cavalli

Ok, I'm not a fan of all the cut-outs or the tropical prints, but some of these patterns are SUPER in this collection from Just Cavalli.  Check it out here.

I love the loud colors and the patchwork style of some of the clothes (especially the pants!).

Favorites are: 2, 3, 6, 9 and 53.

Soapbox: Sexual assault and clothes

Ok, I'm sorry if this brings everyone down, but I'm having a moment of fatigue.

I think that discussing sexual harassment, sexual violence and violence against women is important.  I often find it annoying that these can be taboo subjects.  I think it is through intelligent discussion that we can overcome the stigma, fear, mystery, ignorance, and hopelessness that surround these issues, and come up with some solutions and maybe open some minds.

Or maybe not.  Maybe I'm completely wrong.  Maybe it is just a pointless exercise.

I'm referring in particular to discussions around rape/sexual harassment/molestation of women and girls and of course the other big thing that comes up in those discussions: what she was wearing.

And just to be clear, I'm talking about in-person, face-to-face discussions, not online discussions (which better people than I have attempted and mostly failed).

No matter how much I've talked, rephrased, listened and tried to see from the other perspective with people who are not already 100% in agreement with me, I don't think I've ever successfully helped anyone to understand that the victim's clothing is fundamentally not relevant.

I had one of these discussions today and it has left me concluding this:  Do not ever bother trying to explain the irrelevance of a woman/girl's clothes in the designation of culpability in an instance of rape/sexual harassment/molestation.  It is futile.

I was having this discussion with an intelligent, feminist woman thinking that we were pretty like-minded and in agreement on this.  I was complaining about how frustrating it was to help people understand something this simple:  What a woman is wearing should not endanger them and never can legitimize violence or violation done against them.

But no.  This woman thought it was important to make me understand that "when a woman dresses to provoke/seduce/titillate and then goes out in public, she needs to take responsibility" and "deal with the consequences."

WTF.  I mean, WTF. WTF WTF WTF.  No.  That is wrong.

Having a Fashion Moment: Giles

Sorry for all the fashion posts, but I'm enjoying looking over all the London Fashion Week photos.

I really like this collection: beautiful, eerie printed maxi dresses and some awesome designs with lips (in purple!) and bats!  I also love the sunglasses, and pairing the gowns with comfy sneakers.

My faves: 9, 21, 28, 24, 37 and you HAVE to check out 41

Photogsnazzy: blue skies

Some days the sky is such an amazing color of blue, you feel glad just to witness the color, no matter how mundane you might be.

P.S. If I would learn photoshop, I could get rid of that smudgy bush in the corner!

Inspiration Lately: Entrepreneurial Spirit and Jennifer Gilbert

"We all have defining moments in our life in our life that can keep us stuck where we are, or can help us move forward and create something."



I'm definitely curious to check out her book!

Having a Fashion Moment: Orla Kiely

I absolutely love this collection from Orla Kiely!  Check it out here.

There are berets! and knee socks! and lots of pockets! and adorable, fun prints!  I've been really into groovy, quirky prints lately.  So I pretty much want every skirt, dress, and jacket from this collection!

Also dig the bags, especially the one with rhino!

Having a Fashion Moment: PPQ

I've been vaguely following the Fashion Weeks . . . mostly via stuff that is popping up on my facebook newsfeed from British Vogue, Nylon or pinterest.

My favorite find this year has definitely been PPQ's collection!  Check it out here.

I really love the colors: black, purples, red and some yellow!  Right up my street!

British Vogue used "Gothic Nineties" to describe the collection, as well as "vamp" and I think that captures it perfectly.

I especially love the gowns with the sheer ruffles!

My favorites: 8, 13, 19, 22, 23, and 26.

25 Things Before 26

I turned 25 this summer.  Here is my list of goals for the next year.  A lot of them are the same as last year!  Hopefully I can do better at remaining focused and accomplish more this year.

1.  Read these books:  Lean In, The Beauty Myth, Survival of the Prettiest, A Handmaid's Tale, and Gone Girl

I need to read these books.  It is ridiculous that I haven't read The Beauty Myth or A Handmaid's Tale.  I really should read Lean In and Survival of the Prettiest.  Gone Girl I just want to read.  I need to make a point of accomplishing this.  Five books in a year?  I should be able to do that.

2.  Since we are on the subject of reading . . . Finish reading Anna Karenina and Howards End.

I started reading these several years ago and I have always been meaning to finish.  Time to get with it!  Also I've been avoiding watching the movie until I finished Howards End.  No spoilers!

3.  Learn some basic sewing and alteration.

I want to be able to repair and alter my clothes.  My clothes will fit better and last longer.  If anyone knows of any good classes, let me know!

4.  Since we are on the subject of sewing  . . . Go to a tailor.

I have several cute items that I need to get tailored to fit me better.  Some stuff is more complicated that I can probably handle once I just learn the basics, and it is silly to have a pile of stuff that I can't wear because I'm too lazy to find a tailor and pay for the alterations.

5.  Get new glasses.

I got my new prescription just have not actually chosen and purchased the new glasses.  I really need new glasses.  I haven't updated my prescription since 1999 according to my doctor.  It would be really useful to be able to see when I can't wear my contacts.  So I have a year to get my act together and actually get some some new glasses.

Says the Internet: Do a lot.

Again, I was reading this article (a while ago now) that a friend had been circulating on facebook, advising us creatives to take a look.  The article has some good advice or "survival hints for young creative weirdos."

One of the author's hint made me pause and reflect as again I was made aware of my attitude towards creativity and productivity, and that attitude was challenged:

"Do a lot. This may seem like strange advice, but I mean it — do a lot. Write a lot, paint a lot, shoot a lot of film, take a lot of pictures, dance a lot, sing a lot, whatever the thing you do is, do it a lot. You have to get limber and skilled, so that when you have an idea, you can manipulate it and do the work part of the work. The idea is sort of the balloon in a balloon animal; you have to have it, and it has to be strong, or else there's nothing. But you'll be distinguished more by your handling of it than by the thing itself, and the best way to do that is to do the thing you do a lot."

Growing up with parents that had expectations of excellence in everything their children did, but also a potent, unspoken hierarchy for the which areas of interest took precedence, I always struggled with deciding what exactly to pursue.  As a person naturally interested in a lot of things, I was (and still am) frequently immobilized when faced with the choice of what interest or passion to explore.

The pressure to invest either all or nothing into a select few (productive) interests or activities may have indeed shut down a lot of my creative impulses.  If I wasn't able to or sure I wanted to commit 110% to something, well then, I'd better not bother with it at all (because I clearly wasn't interested enough) and rather focus more on something useful like learning algebra or operating a power drill. (Not that those thing are not important or useful.)  Combined with my natural shyness, I think this pressure drove me to just categorically refuse to engage with things (like dance, art, photography, economics) that peaked my interest but were never given a chance to fully flesh out or dwindle away.

Photogsnazzy: summertime sun

Summer is almost over.  I tried to capture some of that sunshine around the house.

Says the Internet: on being "the best" or not mattering

Several weeks ago I read this article on 10 Things Most Americans Don't Know About America.  It was interesting.  I don't necessarily agree/disagree/believe/don't believe everything he says, but it is always good to hear different perspectives on things.  On the whole, most of it didn't really surprise me, but his #8 thing really rather floored me.

"8. WE’RE STATUS-OBSESSED AND SEEK ATTENTION

I’ve noticed that the way we Americans communicate is usually designed to create a lot of attention and hype. Again, I think this is a product of our consumer culture: the belief that something isn’t worthwhile or important unless it’s perceived to be the best (BEST EVER!!!) or unless it gets a lot of attention (see: every reality-television show ever made).
This is why Americans have a peculiar habit of thinking everything is “totally awesome,” and even the most mundane activities were “the best thing ever!” It’s the unconscious drive we share for importance and significance, this unmentioned belief, socially beaten into us since birth that if we’re not the best at something, then we don’t matter.
We’re status-obsessed. Our culture is built around achievement, production and being exceptional. Therefore comparing ourselves and attempting to out-do one another has infiltrated our social relationships as well. Who can slam the most beers first? Who can get reservations at the best restaurant? Who knows the promoter to the club? Who dated a girl on the cheerleading squad? Socializing becomes objectified and turned into a competition. And if you’re not winning, the implication is that you are not important and no one will like you."

(Although I rather love hyperbolic expression, so I'm not 100% with him on that), I was just knocked over by how well he summarizes American society's (in my experience, at least) "obsession" with being the best.  Manson defines it as "the belief that something isn't worthwhile . . . unless it's perceived to be the best or unless it gets a lot of attention."  He goes on to elaborate: "It's the unconscious drive we share for importance and significance, this belief . . . that if we're not the best at something, then we don't matter."

This just strikes home with me so much!  This idea that I essentially don't matter because I'm not the best or even that exceptional at anything really feels so true to me.  For me, it is one of those beliefs you don't even realize you hold fundamentally true until someone really carefully points it out to you--- it really has be "beaten into me".  Reading this article was really a "whoa!" moment for me as I realized that this idea is just that: an idea--- and a belief that can be changed and that other people don't necessarily hold.