Thoughts on Selfie (the TV show) and fashion

I have been getting a big kick out of the new fall ABC show (unfortunately) named Selfie.  The show is loosely based on the story of Pygmalion.  Although initially, there was a lot of concern that this was going to be a show about a man telling a woman how to behave according to societal rules and policing her sexuality.  But as the episodes progressed, the show quickly moves away from that and to a more well-rounded idea of what this mentorship/friendship/relationship(?) can be.

As much as Henry is striving to smooth Eliza's rough edges, improve her image, and shape her into a less shallow, self-obsessed woman, Eliza challenges him when she thinks he's being truly narrow-minded and shows him that there are many ways in which he can improve.  One of my favorite parts of the show (besides John Cho being funny, Karen Gillian being carefree, Henry's monologue outbursts, and the joke about Henry misunderstanding the meaning of the song Working For the Weekend) comes at the close of a show, after both leads have learned their lesson for the episode: Henry chides Eliza telling her not to be so sexual . . . to which Eliza immediately responds by telling Henry to stop being so uptight and anxious.  This is not the same Eliza naively doing whatever Henry Higgins tells her to do in My Fair Lady--- and saving any disgruntled feelings for a private song about homicide.  This Eliza is not afraid to speak up for herself, and often times it is Henry who changes his ways.

Another fun part of the show is of course Eliza's crazy outfits.  She wears a unique blend of sexy, glamorous, and ostentatious business wear.  Fashion blog CollegeFashion did a great post about the fashion of Selfie and captures Eliza and Henry well  (plus offers some great tips for using their style as inspiration for your own #OOTD).


In reading the CollegeFashion post, not only did I immediately want to put together my own Henry Higgs outfit, but it made me think a lot about fashion and how we chose to use it.  Fashion has a lot of roles.  It is used for self-expression and creativity, as well as used as a way to fit in or show that you are part of one group or a particular identity.  It can be used to stand-out, but often times (and more likely in my opinion) to fit it.  Group identity and social mores plays a big role in what one chooses to wear.  The challenge is to leverage these demands on our fashion with what we feel comfortable and true to ourselves in.  Especially, as women (because what we look like plays such a big role in every aspect of our lives whether we want it to or not), it is helpful to understand what your attitude toward fashion is, how you like to use it, and what you feel comfortable compromising on.

I personally enjoy experimenting with fashion because I like the design/artistry/attitude of certain pieces, I enjoy the creative challenge of putting outfits together that harmonize with each other and flatter me, and I think what we wear can be used to challenge preconceptions and biases we have.   I also believe in what I wear being comfortable . . . fashion isn't fun if it is hurting you or limiting your ability to move.  I feel the most upset and uncomfortable with fashion when I feel like what I am wearing is soulless, void of beauty or creativity, and painful or demobilizing.  I also feel very uncomfortable when I am wearing something that gives a false impression: for example if I was wearing something that made me look like a lawyer at a legal conference when in fact I'm not a lawyer.  Although 'dressing the part' is sometimes very important, I don't like setting up false expectations for myself that I can't live up to.

The College Fashion post made me think about this because they highlight the fashion of "Bryn's Book Club," and you can see from the picture that Eliza does a pretty good job of fitting in.  In Selfie, Eliza often gets into the most trouble when she does a really good job looking the part, but doesn't actually do anything else.  For example, Eliza's brief membership in Bryn's Book Club doesn't go well, because although she is able to transform herself into someone who look like she has the same interests and values as the other girls,  she doesn't make an effort to understand those interests/values.  She doesn't read the book and she just wants the other girls to make her feel like she can easily make friends without putting any effort in---- violating the female-bonding and sharing purpose of the book club.

Another time when Eliza dresses the part, but fails to follow through with understanding the part.

Dressing to join a group identity is important, but it is equally--more-- important to make the effort understand that identity.  Both you and the people in the group suffer when there is false advertising.  A time where Eliza succeeds is in the first episode when Henry takes her has his date to a wedding.  With some help, Eliza selects an outfit that is appropriate and respectful because she takes to heart that this event is not all about her so she doesn't need to wear something overtly sexual or attention grabbing--- that the group is gathering to respect and celebrate two other people.  She ends up with something flattering but not revealing, in a demure blush color, but sparkling with sequins--- staying true to her fun-loving and flashy nature.

Obviously, Eliza's fashion is the most prominent in the show, but what we wear is something that affects everyone.  And as much as it is important to make sure that your fashion is accurately reflecting your identity and your group membership, it is also important to remember that these things are fluid and it is helpful to remain open to change and compromise within a group.  Henry runs into trouble when he is too close-minded or unyielding.  In a recent episode, Henry finds himself in uncomfortable attire because he is so focused on what he wants to do and what he wants to display that he is blind and deaf to the expressions of the others around him when they want to change things up.  I am all for using fashion to challenge unfair expectations or demands of others, but Henry is often being stubborn out of fear or his own sense of being better than others around him.

 

 

 

That doesn't look like the most comfortable outfit for sitting by the pool, Henry.

We all know that fashion is a tricky thing.  I think having a solid understanding of what you are comfortable wearing and saying, and when you are open to compromise.  And just like Henry and Eliza, we are not always going to get it right, and that's ok.  But I think it important not to be a fashion chameleon, moving in and out of group identities and artistic expression, without true purpose and respect for the identities and feelings behind those physical expressions.  When we act without honest intention or for purely self-serving purposes, that is when we run into confusion and conflict.